When life handed me a Canadian Husband, Two Energetic Kids and a Dog with ADHD,
I made myself some Organized Chaos!

Thursday, July 26, 2012

Mommy advice...





Here is the top advise I have gotten when it comes to my boys!  Buckle your seat belts and hold on.


1. Watch your boys body language not his mouth. 
  • Jumping up and down GOOD
  • Slumped shoulders BAD
  • Yelling Good
  • Quiet Bad

2. Yeah Poop Poop Poop
  • Girls usually potty train before boys.  
  • Once boys find the throne they don't stop visiting it
  • Pooping can and probably will always be the highlight of a boys day
  • Boys consider pooping a sport
***.My boys were reading their fortune cookie and in the middle of it says "do,do".  They thought it was the funniest thing EVER.  Oh Goodness...



3. Bedtime is sacred and car rides
  • Because boys are so active, it’s hard to get them to sit still.
  •  The best time of day is the ten minutes before they go to sleep. 
  • Crawl into bed with them, read books, and hold them while they fall off to sleep. 
  • If you don’t believe in God, you will once you have lain next to your overactive son while his body goes limp next to you, and he ever so faintly begins to snore.
  • Car rides-they are tide down and this is the best time to talk!!  
***My kids and I love to sing in the car!  We have a lot of goofy memories.  Also the car is when we have had some big conversations and when they ask the big questions.  


4. Don't tell him he is the man of the house
  • He is the "lil" man but not the man
  • Too much responsibility in that title
  • He is a child allow him to be one


5. Give him some responsibility
  • This will help jim in the future with school and life
  • Will help out with home life now to.  
  • Remember to make all responisbilities age appropriate
***I mess this up at times because I feel at that moment in time that it is easiest to do house stuff on my own but then I realize that is not going to help him. So I am doing better at giving them chores and responsibilities.  


6. Let him show emotion
  •  When your son gets upset, let him express himself, as long as he isn't being destructive or completely out of control. 
  • Talk through things
  • Help him identify his feelings.  Mad, sad, angry, hurt, happy, lonely and so forth
  • Boys tend to solve social problems physically.  Try to get them to talk. 
***This can be frustrating.   I am blunt with my feelings.  But boys are not so blunt.  So giving them words to help them describe there feelings help the situation but also letting them know that you are there for them no matter what is IMPORTANT!!  


7. Boys like hugs

  •  When they get older they may want to do it around their friends and out in public but one in your home is important
***We are lovey dovey so hugs are daily if not hourly!!  

8. Let boys be boys
  • Boys have TONS of energy
  • It is ok.  Don't shut that down that will only cause more problems.  
  • Remind your child that there is a time and place for it though.  
  • Provide them space to let that energy out.  
  • Turn that energy into something productive
***Boys are crazy human beings.  They LOVE LOVE to jump, run throw, hit, and whatever else they come up with.  Let them.  Help them find those outlets.  



9. Limit TV/Video Games
  • Get outside and play
  • Use the imagination
***My boys only get a certain amount of time for the most part.  During the school year NO VIDEO GAMES during the week.  They can play on the weekend but it is limited. 



10. Friends
  • Encourage their friends to come over to your house. 
  • Make it a happy welcoming place for them. 
  • Get to know their friends.
***I want our home to be the place the boys can hang out. Kids in and out.  If they are here then I know what they are doing!  



11. Special Time
  • More than one child--take date night with each boy alone
  • Yes, this includes your husband
***I love these times with my boys!!  


12. Teach organization young
  • Step by step instructions of what to do to keep their room or desk organized.  
  • Don't expect miracles.  Boys are messy. 
***Oh goodness, I am so sad when I go into my son's class room and see his desk.  I teach and teach and live organization and it doesn't sink into their heads.   I will not give up!  :)



13. Figure out as a mom how to LAUGH and LAUGH A LOT
  • This is something I can of looked at people strangely when they said that to me.  Now I can say I get it.  I laugh a lot.  


14. "Nothing"
  • When you ask them what they are thinking and they say "Nothing" it is probably true!  HEHE!  


15. Find Common Ground
  • Find a mutual interest or something they like and you can do!  BOND
***My oldest likes to talk about his video games and my youngest likes to talk music and sports statistics.  So I am all about listening to them!  


16. BOYS EAT
  • Just wait, if they haven't started already, they will eat and tons of food! 
***It is true when they say boys have a hallow leg.  My youngest one is skinny and he eats tons!  Where does it go?  


17. Band Aids
  • Buy lots of them
  • Tons of them
***I have a drawer FULL of them and man do I go through them fast!  


18. Farting
  • They think it is funny
  • They think they can talk about it anytime, anyplace and in front of who ever
***How gross is it when they are talking or walking and they completely stop what they are doing to let one out and then they giggle.  Come on.   


19. Its easier to Raise Boys then to Fix Men



20. Boy do things and get hurt multiple times
  • They think it was a pure fluke they got hurt so they do it again.   
  • Prepare yourself for this 


21. Your home, car and garage will smell like a locker room
  • Boys smell...get use to it. 
***My hubbies car is called the traveling locker room.  It smells and looks like one.  ICKY!



22. Set limits
  • They don't get them now it will be hard to place them later
  • Security for them to have those limits even if they won't admit it


23. They are your son and you love them because of who they are not what they do
  • The sport they play
  • The club they are in
  • The grades they make
These are not who they are and why you love them!  Make that clear!!!!



24. Express to them that family in so important
  • Relationships and family are so much more important than money or careers  


25. “Don’t sweat the small stuff"



26. Boys will fight
  • It is in them to do so 
  • BUT DO NOT EVER HIT A GIRL-  even if she is really annoying!
  • They are wired with the fighting/guns instinct- just limit where they see it.  
***When my oldest was a baby I was like "I am NOT going to buy guys or show them to him!"  Well, that did not matter.  Sooner or later his CARROTS became guns.  



27. Boys get pee on the floor and leave the toilet seat up
  • Have fun and get use to cleaning up around the toilet
***My hubby says that they leave the toilet seat up because they are helping out the next guy that comes into the bathroom.  It is one of those man code things.  WHATEVER!!




28. Boys will get dirty
  • Learn to get rid of stains
  • Don't get mad when they come home with dirty jeans and holes in their pants.  
  • Good luck doing hand me downs when they get older.  


29. Superheros
  • They all think they are one!  


30. Brothers


  • They will fight
  • But they will not let anyone fight with their brother.  


Boys are amazing!!  Boys have taught me to laugh more and not be surprised with much.  There is obviously 100s more but I thought 30 was a good start!!  




Friday, July 20, 2012

Message from God

I don't know if anyone else that has facebook has the app called God wants YOU to know...Message from God.  I receive one each day and I take everyone in but there are some days that hit me and really make me think about life and what God wants and has laid out for us.  Here is today's...


On this day of your life, Stacey, we believe God wants you to know ... that family is not a name for a group of people, but the quality of relationships between them.  Relationships grounded in mutual love, trust, caring and forgiveness. In all the ups and all the downs of life. Look closely, - who is really your family, and who in truth are just strangers in for the ride?

Makes you think about life!  

Monday, July 16, 2012

Being Grateful and some more...


I am Thankful for SOOO Many things.  Here is a VERY VERY VERY short list of things I am thankful for that we take for granite.  
  1. A church home and freedom to love God
  2. My Husband- there are over 90 million singles in America.  That is a lot of people that can't come home to a loved one.  I am blessed to see his face daily and share my love with.  I get to share the ups and downs in life with him.
  3. Our Children- about 7.3 million woman can't have babies.  This number breaks my heart in so many pieces.  I am so blessed to be able to have my kiddos and love them daily!
  4. Our Families- They may drive me crazy sometimes but at the end of the day they are the ones I love tons!!
  5. Our Puppy-  Ummm...she is too cute!
  6. Life- Each day is a GIFT!!
  7. Love- not everyone can count on this.  We take love for granite.
  8. We are healthy- More than 32 million children are Chronically sick in the US. I tend to complain about my aches and pains or my youngest ADHD or my oldest asthma.  But really these are all manageable and we can and have adapted to each situation.
  9. Our home- More than a million school aged children are homeless.  Times we wish for bigger homes more space.  "Luxury" but why?  We have space, we have a roof over our head.  I pray daily for those who are not able to be thankful for those things we take advantage of.
  10. Heath Insurance- 44 million people do not have insurance.
  11. Jobs to pay the bills- 12.7 million people in the US don't have a job
  12. Our vehicles-to get around
  13. Phones to communicate with others
  14. Food to feed our family-17 million children go to bed hungry
  15. Memories-   463,000 children  live in foster care so what kind of memories are they making there?
  16. Laughter we share with each other, family and friends- We
    laugh daily!
  17. Sports we are able to be in
  18. Clothing
  19. Air Conditioning- 3,131,000 households do not have a/c
  20. Heat- Millions are without
  21. Safety- 3.3 million children in US observe violence in their homes. 
These are things we become comfortable with and really take for granite.  I am so sorry that I ever took any of those things for granite.  It makes me feel sad that I have complained for more or whatever else.  


Being grateful helps in so many ways...
  1. Changes your mood and the mood of those around you
  2. Helps you cherish the present and being in the moment-you don't miss life
  3. Helps you focus on the real priorities of life
  4. Helps you enjoy the simple things of life!
  5. Reduces envy and reduces negativeness
  6. Improves your health

So what now.  Looking at those stats and crazy facts isn't the solution.  We need to pray, be grateful and HELP OTHERS.  

Ideas...

  1. Mission Trips
  2. Bring food to homeless shelters
  3. Bring food to pantries
  4. Put on fundraiser for someone with a medical condition to help with bills.
  5. Volunteer Time at Big Brother Big Sister, Community Centers and Shelters
  6. Donate to your churches Benevolence funds.
  7. Donate school supplies
  8. Help at a Pet Shelter
  9. Make a card for someone who needs to feel someones love
  10. Make craft kits for children's hospitals
  11. Offer to drive someone who doesn't have a car
  12. Volunteer at Habitat for Humanity
  13. Smile at someone/acknowledge people and accept them for them
  14. Invite someone to a holiday meal or a family meal
  15. Help with scholarships with sporting/extracurricular activities




What are your ideas??  What are your thoughts of being grateful!??

Saturday, July 14, 2012

Tanner Taylor Tompkins

    I can not believe 10 years ago in a few hours I went into labor with our first born.  In those few hours before having our first son I saw panic in my husbands eyes, fear, and a proud proud daddy!!   Even though the lil man was early he was healthy.   I remembered day two at the hospital I called my mom from the hospital and said "He is sooo little and he kinda looks like an unbaked chicken!"  Poor thang....so small just under 5lbs and even though he may have looked like an unbaked chicken I have to say he was the sweetest little unbaked chicken I ever did see. I was so proud of him at that moment.  He didn't do a thing but he made my heart swell with love and pride.
    10 years later my heart is so full with pride and love.  He has showed me things in life that I never thought I would see or feel. He has accomplished so much and loved so hard to all those who he has come into contact with!  I am so proud of him and I am 10 years more in love with him today then I was the day I laid with him in the hospital bed.



Dear First Born

I've always loved you best because you were our first miracle. You were the genesis of the fulfillment of young love. You sustained us through the hamburger years, and tacos daily,  our first shack (house in the middle of the corn field) our first mode of transportation (1993 Ford Probe), and the seven-inch TV that only had infomercials on it.

You were new, had unused grandparents, and enough clothes for a set of triplets. You were the original model for a mom and dad who were trying to work the bugs out.   We are so blessed to have you as our first born. 

Thank you for being generous with the "its ok mom's", "its ok dads".  We promise to pay for all of our new mommy and daddy moments in any therapy sessions that you may need when you are older!  : P  

You got the strained lamb, the open safety pins and three-hour naps. You were the beginning! Thank you for being you and thank you for filling our hearts with the love and pride any parent hopes to have one day!

Love, 
Mom 


My Little Stud


PS...Share your memories of the little man and I will be reading this to him tomorrow night!!  Thanks everyone!